It’s Just Poison…

I hate binding to data list because they add in a ton of extra code that is a bitch to clean up. I like handling and manipulating the raw data and outputting it exactly as I like. So, my dilemma with PagedDataSources is that you need to bind them to a data list to get the data (to the best of my knowledge).

Here’s how I got around it:

1. Fill up your PagedDataSource with data
2. Bind it to a data list (ex: theDataList)
3. In the Data List on the aspx page, pump all the data back to the .vb page into a function.
4. Create a literal on the .aspx page (ex: litOutput)
5. In the function that is used to marshal the data, append all the output to the literal on the aspx page (litOutput.Append(strOutput))
6. After the command to connect the PagedDataSourse to the data list (theDataList.DataSource = objDps / theDataList.DataBind()), make it not visible:
theDataList.Visible = False

BAM! You now have all your data in the literal and the data list with all it’s crappy ass <br/>’s and <span>’s are no where to be found =)

.: Adam

Last weekend was another impromptu weekend travel for me. This time, I convinced a couple friends of mine to join me (Mike, Alison, and Marke). The plan was simple: we meet up at 5:30pm in Chinatown to catch a $10 bus ride to Philadelphia, walk to the tattoo convention, meet friends, sleep, come back. Oh, and to party the entire time =)

That was also the fullest extent of our plans. Who was going to be there, where it was, what was going on, where we were going to sleep, and the how/when we were going to get home was all up in the air. I’m used to this, but I wasn’t sure how well my friends were going to take it. I just kept telling them, “don’t worry, I have it all planned out” Hahahaha!

Mike and I met up ahead of time to hit up J&R (an electronics store) to get some new toys for our cameras. He picked up a lens filter and I grabbed a new speed-flash, lens filter, and a Hi-Fi card. The Hi-Fi card is pretty sweet. It’s an SD RAM card for cameras and the such that has a built in WiFi antenna and firmware, so when you take a photo, it’ll automatically connect to a WiFi network and upload the photo to a computer on the network or the Internet. PIMP! I was pretty eager to try it out, but that’s when it hit me…. FUCK! My point-n-click camera was in my leather jacket that just got stolen! Dammit dammit dammit!

ok… breath…

After hitting up J&R we grabbed some food then headed back to my place. We packed our things then jumped in a cab to Chinatown.

WAIT! I almost forgot the most importat part! FIRST, we filled our flasks with Jager, then did a couple shots to ensure an unsober state, THEN we got in a cab to Chinatown =)

Alison met us at the bus stop about five minutes after we got there. Marke was MIA. I gave him a ring and he said he was running late, so we bought tickets for the 6:30 bus. What an ordeal that was. Two little chinese women were trying to sell us the tickets on the street, both ringing me up for 4 tickets and screaming at me in what I think, THEY thought was english, but sounded more like a cat getting run over slowly. If you ever see two elderly chinese women fight for a sale on the street, it’s quite an entertaining site. Especially when you have absolutly no clue what’s going on.

Somehow, I got the tickets (i think). I got a piece of paper with some letters and numbers on it. She got $40. We’ll find out later if the bus driver likes my piece of paper with letters and numbers! But for now, we have time to kill, so on to the bar! Fontana’s (a kind of rock’n'roll bar) was just down the street. Perfect! We had a couple tasty beverages there until Marke showed up, then headed back to the bus stop and boarded the bus.

I won’t get into all the shenanigans that took place on the bus, but the gist of it is that we now had a gang sign, we video taped most of it (Alison even followed mike to the bathroom at one point), laughed our asses off pretty much the entire way, and irritated probably everyone on the bus…a lot =)

We arrived in Philly sometime around 9ish and then walked a few blocks to the hotel where the convention was being held. We bought our wristbands to get in, and ran almost immediately into a friend of mine running a booth with some third-reich-esqu curtains (inside joke ;). She let us drop our stuff down there while we ran around (read: went to the bar).

Mike and I did take a little bit of time wondering the convention area taking photos, and saw a lot … seriously … a lot of semi-nekkid girls. I’m not sure if it’s a Philly thing or what, but we weren’t complaining.

For me, the best part about the convention were the shows. Enigma was there with his show, Disgraceland was there tearing it up, and even the Rites of Passage crew were there doing some suspension performances. The two best (in my mind), were the single-hook suspension, and the single-knee suspension. The chicks knee looked like a scene out of Hellraiser. You know, a mangled mess of flesh and steel… put in a situation where your body is confused as to whether or not it’s turned on or repulsed. Good times!

When the convention was over, Murphy’s law came put on a show. Surprise! Apparently they attempted to do a flesh-pull WHILE the show was going on. I didn’t see anything though… I was too busy running around the pit like a crazy man. Ton’s of fun!

We all know what’s next… food! And what do you eat in Philly? Cheesesteaks! We all jumped in a cab and headed to Gino’s cheesesteaks. Marke and I each got two =). I was not so smart in the sense that I thought it would be a good idea to leave my coat back at the convention. So I’m standing around in the snow fall and bitter winds of Philly in a hoodie and sweat. (Somehow, I didn’t get sick either)

We jumped in a cab and headed back to the convention to try and figure out where we were going to sleep. I tried getting ahold of my friends of the freakshow performance, but to no avail. We headed up to my friend Rachel’s room to see who was all there and probably chill with some people. If I know her, she’d probably invited everyone up for after-hours.

And I was right =). Her room was packed with people all lounging around, laughing and having a good time. Looks like we found the place to be! Jimmy from Texas was also there. He saved the evening with some “movies” that seemed to have cleared out the room. Leaving us to crash out. Marke just stayed passed out on the floor, Alison an I passed out in the one bed, Jimmy took the other bed, and mike slept on some cushions on the floor. I don’t think Mike trusted Jimmy too much =)

The next morning, we got up around 11am, and headed downstairs. Marke wanted to get a couple micro-dermals done by Jimmy before we left. The kicker is that none of us wanted to pay the $20 to get back into the convention the next day. So, I did a little smooth-talking / jedi mind tricks to sneak myself past security and meet up with Jimmy at the booth. Turns out, he was out of dermal punches, so he was passing the job off to someone else that could do it with needles. But she wouldn’t be available for a couple hours. Mike, Marke, and Alison all got stopped at the door, so I just told Jimmy that we’d come back later and headed back outside.

To kill time, we all walked to the Mütter Museum. It’s an amazing, one-of-a-kind museum of human medical oddities. I’ve been there before, but I knew that my friends would like it, so we went for a little field trip.

On the way back, we stopped at Jimmy John’s for lunch (mmmmmm….), then continued our walk to the hotel.

When we arrived I though I heard a siren going off. Sure enough, the entire hotel was being evacuated! Perfect timing. We hung around outside with everyone while the firemen cleared out the building and seemed to have determined that it was a false alarm. We all filed back into the building and headed upstairs to the convention area.

This time, I did a little coaching and used some old-school State Theater tricks to sneak everyone (including myself) into the convention =) Boo-yah!

Oh, and there was a huge biker fight. Someone broke a broomstick over another dude. Lots of punching, then what looked like about a hundred cops showed up with batons to end it. Yadda, yadda, yadda…

Back to the booth. Marke got two micro-dermals done (one on his chin, and another on his neck) and I got to see “Penguin” get his wrists / elbows / shoulders scarred. He doesn’t have any arms, so I’m not sure what to technically call that area. The cuts were made to look like stitches, so that he can tell everyone that he was bad as a kid and his parents had his arms cut off and hands reattached to his torso. Hahahaha! Too funny =)

Alison bought a pair of some seriously intricate earrings from Jimmy. Hand-carved skulls with snakes made from wild boar tusk. Check out Demonic Organics. Jimmy makes some of the most amazing jewelry! We then said our goodbyes and our thank-you’s to our friends there and headed back to the bus stop.

We hit up a Wawa (like a 7-11) for some provisions, then boarded the bus.

The trip home was only an hour and a half, so we made it into the city around 6:30pm.

24 hours to the dot, from when we left, we had returned. Alison headed home to get ready to go to work (she bartends at Double Down) and Mike, Marke and I headed the other direction. Down to three.

Mike then jumped in a cab, and headed home. Down to two.

Marke and I then stopped in a bar to visit our friend Ru that was bartending then. We all did a shot (i think about half the bar). Marke wanted to stay and hang out, but I had to head home to pack. I was supposed to be on a flight at 6am out of Newark. Had to get ready… Down to one.

I walked the rest of the way home with a pit-stop at Identity to say wassup to my friend Lawrence, and make sure a certain chick got a message, then walked the rest of the way home.

I dropped my bags and plopped my ass on the couch around 8pm.

The trip was over.

Shizzle.

=)

.: Adam

i want you to read this twice because that’s how i lived it, and then in turn experienced it. There are three levels here, but only the first two are apparent. The third, which to me is even more terrifying wasn’t discovered until it was over.

i accomplished a mission. I saw stuff, and I had a completely horrible experience (for the most part).

I was expecting something, but not this. This was… intense.

I took the whole thing this time. The bigger one at that. Everything started out like before. Just laughing my ass off about everything and all around craziness.

i then saw it. And i dont’ mean “saw it”. I read a text message and my phone was one of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen. I started to see prisms in the light. I got a text form someone to meet me at a bar down the road. Quick walk to the place really. Maybe 8 or 9 blocks.

i was on cloud 9 and feeling pretty adventurous! I put on a couple jackets (it’s december) and headed outside. As I was walking to the park I saw the prisms even more, and they were mesmerizing. As if NYC isn’t enough, this was NYC on x-mas. So there were lights everywhere and I was having a blast and laughing my ass off. Good times. It was part, “i’m finally seeing something” and the other, which was more overwhelming, was the sheer experience. You can’t see these things unless your there. There’s no special effect or funny glasses that give you this.

i was in another world, and loving it!

I think i was on 5th and A… maybe 4th. Not sure really. But I was sure that the mural painted on the gates of the closed building was freaking me out. That’s when it hit me…”the fear”. It was a physical entity, not a feeling.

i remember thinking, should i continue on to the bar, or go home. thank god i hailed a cab.

i made the cabbie stop at 6th and C and threw my money at him. i think i paid somewhere around $10 for a $4 cab ride. didn’t matter. The Fear was getting larger, and more surrounding.

i kept telling myself that all i needed to do was get home. i can do this… 3 blocks…. i can do this.

i got to 7th st. and realized i couldn’t make it. What put me over the edge was that i was across the street from a police station and i’m tripping balls with no ID and the that’s when it happened. The Fear had morphed into what I now know of as Pure Evil. And it didn’t morph into a different entity, it became me. I was Pure Evil. It didn’t get to my core, but it had definitely gotten under my skin. It made sure that I wasn’t wearing it, but that I had become it, and it was just getting deeper. It was going for the bone. For the core.

I was convinced that i was going to curl up in a ball on the street and totally loose my shit. I was breathing fear, and harboring evil. Right now I’m pissed of at these words… not what I’m writing, but the actual letters and words. They cannot describe the intensity that I was feeling.

i summoned up all that i had, and new it was my only shot, so i had to make it work. i called my roommate. thank god she picked up the phone. i kept her on the phone and she guided me back to the apartment. our friend Robb also helped out by coming to meet me on the street.

i got inside and Pure Evil took over. I was scared shitless. I have never been so afraid of anything in my life. Death is easier to accept than to take on this… thing. This thing that was on … in me.

i went to my couch, and that’s when it hit me. I’m pretty sure I knew all along, but admitting it made it real. I can cope with real.

i was wearing black leather pants, and a black leather jacket and black shirt. I was hot as hell. The sweat coming out of me was the fear being pushed out by Pure Evil.

i knew what i had to do. i took off my jacket, my pants, and my shirt. (thankfully i was wearing grey boxers).

i needed to strip off the evil… i needed to get it off me so that i could then focus on the evil in side me.

i found a pair of white shorts, and a white shirt.

i honestly think that if i didn’t have them / find them, i would have just sat around in my boxers. but the grey was too close to black, so maybe not.

i’m wearing all white. i feel better. a wave of comfort comes over me. this is what i need. unfortunately i was sitting in my bedroom with a burned out light, so i was sitting in darkness. that comfort was being stripped away quickly.

i had to get out of the room.

i went into the living room. black couch, black floor, black paint. The Pure Evil was gaining strength. I moved farther to the kitchen. My WHITE kitchen. Better. From here out it gets hellishly intense dealing with the Pure Evil that’s taking over my mind and body.

i am a little cowering child, but cannot run away from it. This is me.

i then moved into the bathroom where it was even more white. i have a black shower curtain, but i let it stay. i just don’t look at it. Throughout all this my roommate is with me and telling me everything is ok.

i knew it was lame.

i knew where i was, was my home.

i didn’t give a fuck. i was scared out of my fucking skull. Scared of the evil. Please keep in mind that, although now (and somewhat while this was going on) i had a clue, this isn’t a metaphor for anything. This was exactly what i’m saying. Pure Evil.

I forced myself to vomit. A lot. I vomited until everything was clear. I was literally cleansing my body from the inside of the Evil.

i know it’s easy to see the self-preservation, and animal instinct acting on pure survival, and that this evil I’m referring to are the mushrooms i ate, and my body (not me) is doing what it knows to stay alive. I poisoned myself. My body said, “fuck you asshole” and came up with with great inventive way to get rid of the toxins. I even saw this connection while going through all of it, BUT it didn’t matter. Reality was gone… waaaaaay gone. I had succumb to this Evil, and I had to play along.

i also drank a shit ton of water. i needed to stay cool. i even dropped some onto my feet. i washed me feet at one point too. there was black fuzz from my socks on them, so obviously it had to go.

i also had the thought about my hair. having black hair also freaked me out. Not only that, but for some reason I decided…really just let myself grow a beard (what I can grow anyway). So i now have long black hair, and a beard-ish thing going on. i resolved this by keeping it back, not looking in a mirror, and always looking up. almost as if i was looking for help. i knew i wasn’t going to get anything, but looking up kept me a little bit more relaxed. umm… no. not relaxed… that doesn’t happen. just less terrified. that’s better.

I think looking up also helped with the fact that i have tattoos.

i’m not even going to think what i would have done if i saw them. they did freak me out though… i just pretended they didn’t exist. please keep in mind that my roommate is still with me the whole time. there were a couple instances where she left when we thought i was doing better.

i knew it was “childish” (that word is there for me to remember something else about tonight), but i needed her there to tell me it was ok, and that everything was normal. i think that if i was forced to have gone through this on my own, i may have literally snapped and never come back…

i went through more vomiting, and more water later, i’m starting to feel ok. and now cold.

i decided it was time to brave a lesser white room.

i left for the kitchen. not so bad really. a little disturbing… the Pure Evil was gone, but now The Fear had returned. He liked to remind me what was up.

i kept Him in check and grabbed a red blanket and headed downstairs.

i was doing good.

i was feeling slightly normal again.

i felt the fear… he was winnning.

i went back upstairs and into the bathroom to start the process all over. the red blanket wasn’t cutting it. Thankfully i had a white bathrobe on the door in the bathroom. YES! White AND warm. Perfect!

i hung out for a little while longer and tried my best to overcome The Fear.

i did it.

i left.

i went to the kitchen. heart beat rises slightly, but i reassure myself that it’s ok, and that I’m in control.

i go into the living room and don’t even LOOK into the darkness that is my bedroom.

i could almost hear the Evil that I shed in there screaming…writhing in agony. It wanted me.

i went downstairs.

i overcame The Fear.

i was warm.

i was calm. And a wise “little” woman looked me in the eyes and told me…

i am jesus.

Was watching a new Henry Rollins Spoken Word tour DVD. He started to talk about travel, and he hit it. He described almost to the “T” why and how I travel:

“As I’m working away, I see Christmas looming closer and closer. I want to do something eventful for Christmas, I’m not going to put a tree in my apartment and put lights on it. I’m just too fucking lazy and apathetic. And so I just need to go somewhere for Christmas. I do not believe in going somewhere on a holiday or a vacation just to sit in some place where the skin will damage my poor pale pasty white skin, and I don’t want to live in a hotel doing the same thing when I’m home, watching MacGiver on rerun. I want something that will educate me. I want to out into the world and learn a thing or two. I think we as a species; we need to travel more. All of you need to leave your country on a regular basis. Trust me your country will still be here when you get back. I just think it’s important for people to go to countries where they’re not familiar, where they definitely look like they’re not from there, they need to eat food that they cannot pronounce the name of, listen to music that they can’t understand, and shake the hands of everyone and say crazy things like, “Hey! What’s going on?” I think we need to do this more often, thus we become xenophobic, living a boring, flat-lined, fucked up life. This is why I travel. To get cultured. So where can I go get cultured for Christmas? Well, I don’t want to do it in Florida, or Hawaii to get cultured on a hammock, with a “cervesa” and a laptop burning a design of an apple into my chest. I want to go someplace else.

And so on one evening on my way to the movies, I come up with where I’m going to go for Christmas. I’m like, “ohhh, this is fantastic!” And the idea of it terrifies me, “I could die. I shouldn’t go there. I have to go there!” And I don’t understand this thing with me. This Psych 101 thing. I get this idea to go somewhere, and the next thing I hear is my voice, “If you don’t go, you’re a pussy. If you do not go to this place, you do not deserve to eat. If you do not go, you are fucking worthless.” And it becomes fairly obsessive.

[...]

Next thing I know, I’m in my home away from home, Los Angeles International Airport. I go from Los Angeles to Heathrow International airport, and from Heathrow for my Christmas break…aaahhhh. Inthralling, sparkling, urbanite, cosmopolitan, Islamabad Pakistan! I just figured a guy could learn a thing or two.

[...]

Once I got there, I do what I always do. I dropped my bag, grabbed my water, and started pounding the streets walking around. I have a plan when I do all these trips. The first half is, “I’m Going!” The second half is, “I have no idea, not a fuckin’ clue what happens next.” And that is the difference between being a tourist, and being a traveler. A traveler doesn’t know where he’s going. The tourist doesn’t know where he is.

And so that’s what I like to do. I like to walk through cities, and say crazy things like, “Hi, I’m Henry. I’m from America. I’m really glad to be here.” And see what happens.”

Mike: so yeah, dude, seriously, some nsfw warning would be nice for that shit
.: Adam: hahaha
.: Adam: nvr
Mike: bstd
.: Adam: wrd
Mike: fsh
.: Adam: f’sho
.: Adam: bzl
Mike: nzl
Mike: nga
.: Adam: tzl
Mike: crka
.: Adam: fk
Mike:
.: Adam: HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHA
Mike: yeah, that’s right, I took it all the way down

I recently purchased the iPhone app called Flipbook, and I have to say that it’s great =)

It’s by far the best time killer out there. There are just so many cool things to create with this. Should be fun forever! In the app, it also allows you to upload the finished films to their website (Flipbook.tv). From there, I just saved out the MP4 files, and sent them to YouTube.

Here are the 2 I’ve made so far:

I stumbled on this guys blog: http://www.blagotubes.com/

I was looking for an image that said “whoops” with google’s image search and came across it. You should check it out if you’re a geek. Pretty funny =)

Here’s a couple of his things:

It’s about damn time!

Click here for the full article

awww… look how sad he is… lol.

.: Adam

I received an IM request from a new person, Essie. I was bored. I accepted.
Here is what followed:

Essie: Hi!
Me: hi
Essie: hey, A/S/L?
Me: word
Essie: hey whats up babe, U got a webcam? finally someone adds me, I am soo fuckin horny today for some reason lol
Me: yoda is small
Essie: listen hun, I am just about to start my webcam show with jen, come chat me there in my chat room? We can cyber, I will get naked if u do..lol!
Me: may the force be with you. i eat babies.
Essie: I can show u how to watch if u promise not to tell anyone else how to do it???PLEASE:-$
Me: anus candy for small children force fed by nuns
Essie: [big long spiel with URL to porn site]